The Commish Doublespeaks

Eager to read Tim Finchem’s annual Player's song and dance act in front of the media? Don’t, it’s brutal, even with decent questions and follow-ups from the assembled gazetteers. A few highlights:

We ran the numbers this morning, and this is, strength-of-field-wise, our strongest field in history.

Finchem says this every year at the Players and Jim Awtrey does the same at the PGA. What does it mean? How do you really know it’s the strongest field? And who cares?

This year we're very pleased that we have a couple of new sponsors -- well, one new sponsor in UBS which joins PriceWaterhouseCoopers as our proud supporters.

Isn’t UBS having a special outing Monday after the tournament? No, no one asked that juicy follow up.

You know, the major leagues are investing $400 or $500 million in new stadia [SP.] around the country, whether it be baseball or basketball or football, and they're doing it for the purpose of being able to create an overall fan experience to be able to compete in today's world for some of that time, and we have to address at our tournaments the same kind of competitive needs, and that requires some infrastructure renewal that you'll be seeing us get into over the next five years.

Q. Does that impact your newer courses that you're building?

COMMISSIONER TIM FINCHEM: Well, yes, but it also -- you'll see some of that in San Antonio if we finish up and get going down there, but you'll also see us reinvesting in older clubs starting right here in a couple of years to make that transition to be able to compete in a different kind of environment than we had 15 years ago.

Tim, just say it. You need to renovate some of the TPC’s to deal with the ball, err, better athletes. Oh, and some of them really stink as stadium golf courses.

Q. There was some comments made by Nissan, the sponsor, comments to the effect that the PGA TOUR is one of the only places you know where you can work two days a week and get paid for a week's work. Is there any thought to giving sponsors a break in the event the tournament does not complete three or four rounds?

COMMISSIONER TIM FINCHEM: Did they really say that?

Q. It was printed.

COMMISSIONER TIM FINCHEM: Oh, it was printed.

Looks like the Commish isn’t reading the LA Times (and other publications) where remarks by Nissan’s John Gill were featured prominently.

Q. How much are you talking about investing, and are you looking at perhaps liquidating some of the TPC courses that don't show positive cash flow?

COMMISSIONER TIM FINCHEM: I'm not looking at liquidating anything, and what we may or may not spend is a matter we would discuss on a case-by-case basis at the appropriate time.

Uh, Tim, the liquidating thing that fell through made it in, like, every golf publication. You tried a mini-fire sale of the real dogs of the TPC network. Everyone knows. Sign this man up for a "PGA TOUR(C)" Google News Alert!