Just Wondering What The Tour Wives Are Thinking...
...after reading articles (here and here) about their PGA Tour playing husbands getting touchy about television wanting to put wireless microphones on their man, has me wondering if the traditionally--but-not-always blond life partners are asking the spouses about what precisely is said that can't be heard on national television.
Wife, After Google News Alert Shows Her Article Where He Is Complaining About The Microphones: Honey, what is so awful about what you and [insert looper name here] are talking about while you're standing around all day waiting for Sean O'Hair to pull the trigger?
Tour Drone Who Forgets That Television Networks Pay His Mortgage: Oh lovey, you know what men talk about. Credit default swap, the way Nancy Pe...Barack Obama is to blame for everything. You know, things that men on the PGA Tour are expected to talk about.
Wife, Growing Skeptical: Well that's wonderful honey. Here I thought maybe you were talking about young ladies in your gallery or something lewd like that.
Tour Drone Who Thinks What He Does Is So Very, Very Important To The Survival Of Mankind And The Cure Of All Disease: No no dear, just man stuff. Say, how was the Louis Vuitton outlet store today?
Thursday, April 2, 2009 at 07:54 PM
Reader Comments (3)
Putting a microphone on players and caddies will force them to adopt a new strain of golf-specific guy code. For instance:
Player: Can we meet at 3 for practice?
Caddie: Sure, boss.
Player: If we were playing No. 5 at Pebble in this wind, I'd hit 8-iron, maybe 9.
Caddie: Really, I'd say wedge, but then I'm the one toting the bag.
Player: I hear there's rain in the forecast.
Caddie: 30 percent chance.
Player: I love what they did with the redesign, although the mounding is slightly out of place, don'tcha think?
Caddie: You know, when it comes to course design, I'm a minimalist. Less is more.
Translation: There's a solid 8, maybe a 9, due right on the ropes. She's been following us for three holes and while the rack is possibly fake, there's a 30 percent chance of a hook-up.