"I told myself there ain't but one way to get them out of there, and I reckoned I was gonna have to do it the manly way."

Yes, there are actually people who speak like that. Boo Weekley to be exact.

Golf World's John Hawkins profiles Weekley and shares this among several classic anecdotes:

By October the bumpkin had turned back into a pumpkin. Perhaps the lowest point came when Boo used a Port-a-Pottie at a tournament and dropped his courtesy-car keys in the toilet about two hours before a flight. The good news was the airport was only 20 minutes away. The bad news was Weekley didn't have a fishing rod. "I told myself there ain't but one way to get them out of there, and I reckoned I was gonna have to do it the manly way," Boo says. "So I put some snuff up my nose to cut down the smell, stuck my arm in there and reached around until I found 'em."

"I just hope they never host an (U.S.) Open on it. The USGA would screw it up.”

I saw the Golf Channel's nauseating opening to the sixth major today via TiVo, but when Kelly Tilghman breathlessly called Quail Hollow a "work of art," I deleted the telecast and went back to the Mavericks-Warrior's first half.

The lovefest continues with this Golfweek blog post from Rex Hoggard, which is forgiven since it includes a reminder of just how admired the USGA is these days:

How good is the Quail Hollow layout, stage for this week’s mid-major PGA Tour gathering? As one player said last night, “It is incredible . . . I just hope they never host an (U.S.) Open on it. The USGA would screw it up.”

All of which makes us wonder what to expect next week at TPC Sawgrass. Hard, dry conditions combined with thick rough could turn The Players into a U.S. Open Lite.

TPC...Clubhouse Reviews In

Golfweek's Brad Klein reviews the new TPC clubhouse architecture, giving him a chance to use words like variegated.

The structure offers an expansive, wide-angle view of the course. The building follows the Spanish Mediterranean vernacular tradition of historic St. Augustine, Fla., replete with rope-style columns, clay tile roof, Moorish loggia and numerous Mediterranean arched spaces that offer unrestricted views. The variegated roofline, however, doesn’t have the massive, undifferentiated presence of the previous building and its graceful design can be spotted from most holes on the course.

Meanwhile PGATour.com offers a few pictures and a tour with locker room attendant Conway Murchison. 

New Site Search Feature

Note the new feature in the lefthand column called "Site Search" that lets you search any of my past insults, lame predictions or even your own brilliant insights (by using the advanced search and only searching Journal Comments). And of course you can also still search past posts using the "Journal Topics" link.

The Other Fifth Of Four Majors?

John Dell writes about how the Wachovia event is all things wonderful, with several players implying that the course should host something beyond the prestigious Wachovia. Because after all, it's all right in front you!

“When you have a great golf course the guys will come, and this is one of the neat golf courses we get to play all year,” said Woods, who is playing in just his sixth PGA Tour tournament this year. “It’s straightforward, right in front of you. You have to shape the ball both ways, and on top of that, you’ve really got to putt here.”

And George Cobb, the poor guy who designed it, appears to have been been forgotten. But hey, if we call this a Fazio, he'll finally have the tournament course he's always wanted. Maybe then he'll stop butchering good designs?

Johnny Harris, the president of Quail Hollow who brought his course and the PGA Tour together, agreed that the biggest reason that the top players are here is because of the course.

“I go back to Tom Fazio, who did a wonderful job with our golf course, and our patrons know golf and love being here,” Harris said. “You know, bringing the best players here to North Carolina is something my father always talked about.”

Tom Fazio and patrons. Don't about you, but I'm thinking we may have to go on another fifth major watch here.

Joe Ogilvie, a former star at Duke, said he has heard about Quail Hollow possibly playing host to a bigger tournament.

“This is a pretty good place,” Ogilvie said. “And with this field you could make an argument that it’s better than the PGA Championship field will be in August. This has a major feel to it.”

Whoa, that was close! I think there's a fine Joe for declaring anything other than The Players Championship The PLAYERS a fifth major.  Be careful!

Update on 2007-05-03 15:50 by Geoff

Reader Josh reports that he's pretty sure Golf Channel's Andrew Magee declared the Wachovia the "sixth major." 

Looks like the sixth major watch has officially begun! 

"When you start a relationship, you pretty much know that eventually it will end."

The USA Today's Jerry Potter reports on Phil Mickelson's press conference and the delicacy of teacher-pupil relationships. So he goes to THE source on this subject...

Peter Kostis, a teaching pro and analyst for CBS Sports golf coverage, said teacher-pupil relationships in golf usually change over time.

"There's a half-life to it," he said. "When you start a relationship, you pretty much know that eventually it will end."

Peter, Peter, Peter. So negative! Aren't you the same person who referred me, Norman Vincent Geoff, to some Dr. Phil-like book about being more positive.

And Then There Were Three...

According to Martin Blake, it's down to Kingston Heath, Metropolitan and Royal Melbourne for the 2011 President's Cup.

"How do we build the platform together?"

SI's Alan Shipnuck pens a long (and I mean long!) feature on The Golf Channel Golf Channel and how it's really all things wonderful. So touching to see how fatherhood has mellowed Alan to the point he can listen to Jerry Foltz drone on and not want to scream like Howard Beale.

Well, we learn that Nick Faldo and Kelly Tilghman engaged in carefully conceived exercises (they hiked, they surfed!). And we learn that when you combine the ratings of all the telecasts the numbers are actually up, which still doesn't settle the Sportscenter issue that was the heart of those begging for some ESPN involvement. And we learn that a 15-year deal was necessary because, as Tim Finchem asks inanely rhetorically, "How do we build the platform together?"

Oy.

I did love this from Dave Manougian, who apparently bamboozled the PGA Tour's army of VP's with this logic:

"I'm not sure if there's much difference between 15 years or 12 or 10," says Manougian. "To increase our distribution, we obviously needed a long-term commitment from the Tour, but quite honestly, once you get past six or eight years you sort of say, Well, we might as well go for it now!"

One revealing quote comes from Joe Ogilvie:

"There's no question all of us benefit as the channel grows," says Ogilvie. "There are kickers in the contract to guarantee that. I think players are slowly starting to realize we're married to the channel, so to speak. It's in our best interests to help it succeed."

And isn't this precisely the danger?

That the PGA Tour becomes a soft core version of the Big Break, with the separation of media and player turning each telecast into an infomercial?

Or is an infomercial-like brand plugfest just what today's America finds most comforting?

Oh please thoughtful readers, chime in.

Wachovia Photo Caption Help

Courtesy of the new-look Golfweek.com...
 

Women's British News

They get a new sponsor (Ricoh) and some fine future venues...

Carolyn Bivens, Commissioner of the LPGA commented, "I am delighted that Ricoh will be sponsoring one of our Major Championships. The tournament is played on some of the world's most famous courses and showcases many of the greatest golfers in the world. We are looking forward to travelling to St Andrews in August for the first of what I am sure will be many Ricoh Women's British Open Championships."

It just rolls off the tongue...Richoh Women's British Open.

And...

Sunningdale, Royal Lytham & St Annes and Royal Birkdale set to be Venues for the 2008-2010 Ricoh Women’s British Open

2nd May 2007

Royal Lytham & St Annes Golf Club and Royal Birkdale Golf Club will host the Ricoh Women’s British Open in 2009 and 2010, with the Championship Committee in the final stages of negotiations with Sunningdale Golf Club to host the 2008 Championship, following this year’s historic visit to the Old Course, St Andrews.

"Awkward tee shots in relation to fairways surfaced as the 'No. 1 issue'"

Jimmy Burch on D.A. Weibring and his marching orders to fix the TPC Las Colinas.

But if Tiger is to remain in the mix at Texas-based events, his history says he'll play the Nelson before he surfaces elsewhere. Weibring said Woods offered feedback on the best way to improve the TPC layout: Eliminate "awkward" tee shots on holes No. 10, 12, 15 and 18.

He's not alone. Weibring said awkward tee shots in relation to fairways surfaced as the "No. 1 issue" pros want him to correct this off-season. The greens, they figure, will thrive when resurfaced with fresh bent grass.

I wonder what awkward means? I haven't seen the course, fortunately. Anyone? Are they goofy awkward, or awkward because they force guys to make a decision? I'm guessing goofy awkward.

As an architect, Weibring has skins on the wall. Some of his notable tweaks for 2008 look inviting, particularly a cascading, four-lake water feature down the left side of the 18th fairway.

Oh that ought to have them coming back in droves! 

“The money meter was running on all this stuff"

Last week I wondered if Brian Hewitt had it right about the new $32 million price tag on the TPC Sawgrass clubhouse. Sure enough, Golfweek's Adam Schupak confirms it and shares some of the excuses reasons why the cost just about doubled.

It’s a far cry from the original TPC clubhouse that was built for $1.3 million and opened in 1981. Former commissioner Deane Beman built the project under strict orders not to use the Tour’s assets or put the Tour at liability. This time, the Tour’s co-chief operating officer, Charlie Zink, established a reserve fund that reached $45 million in anticipation of  renovations.

Those reserves will be replenished in five to seven years, according to Pillsbury. How so? Through a combination of club operations, tournament revenue and sponsorship fees.

The Tour sold three companies – UBS, PriceWaterhouseCoopers and Jeld-Wen – “proud partner” tournament-sponsorship packages that include TV inventory and dedicated hospitality and meeting space within the new clubhouse. Its predecessor had limited indoor space for entertaining and little useable space for hosting outdoor events.

The new clubhouse is more than just a place to change shoes and grab a hot dog. It features a Champions Lounge, separate member, player, and resort guest locker rooms, a golf shop, a 2,550-square-foot main dining area with a 1,300-square-foot terrace, and 13,800-square-
feet of banquet and meeting space.

Sounds so quaint!

The clubhouse’s second story is dedicated mainly to the three “proud partner” rooms, each large enough to seat 130 people. Each of the three companies signed a six-year deal that insiders estimate costs $12 million to $14 million annually. (Of that amount, $4 million to $6 million is earmarked to replenish the reserve fund.)

Efforts to further boost the clubhouse’s sponsorship revenue potential led to cost overruns. Initially, Tour executives had planned to build two “proud partner” rooms, but later added a third. The project originally was budgeted between $18 million and $22 million; it cost nearly twice as much to complete.

Satisfying sponsors’ needs also came with a price. During an early site visit, sponsors noted that the commissioner’s hospitality area had a patio. Now the “proud partner” rooms do, too.

Wow, those are some expensive patios!

While construction benefited from the driest summer in 22 years, the Tour still had to dip into its rainy day fund. To ensure the facility would be open for this year’s tournament, a construction schedule of slightly less than a year from demolition to completion was implemented, leading to $2 million in overtime. Normally, a project of this magnitude would take 18 to 24 months, Pillsbury says. Moreover, there was a 30 percent increase in the cost of materials such as steel and concrete during construction, adding $6 million to the final bill.

“The money meter was running on all this stuff,” Pillsbury says.

"It's a lot easier to privately fund-raise for the First Tee than it is to privately fund raise for the city and county"

In Ron Kroichick's report on the likely Yes majority for the PGA Tour-Harding Park contract, I couldn't help but find this disappointing:

Elsbernd had delayed the vote two weeks, so he could try to allay his colleagues' concerns. The proposal -- a revision to the city's original contract with the PGA Tour, announced in 2004 -- called for the tour to give the city $500,000 per event and the First Tee program another $500,000 per event.

Under the new terms, the tour would pay the city $1 million for each event. Any remaining money, after the costs of staging the tournament, would go to First Tee, a program designed to introduce young people to golf and "promote character development" through the game.

Isn't that nice? Take away the Tour's impressive donation for the First Tee to make up for bureacratic bumbling.

Elsbernd and First Tee officials feared the board of supervisors would reject the agreement without this compromise.

"It's a lot easier to privately fund-raise for the First Tee than it is to privately fund raise for the city and county," Elsbernd said. "I'm confident if there are any lost dollars to the First Tee, we'll be able to close the gap" with private donations.

New Look Golfweek.com

I haven't spent much time with it yet, but the new look Golfweek.com looks to be a huge upgrade with plenty of fresh content.

I like the new Politico style columnist sketches, though something about them feels like they were done by a police-artist. Maybe it's the people in the sketches and not the artist's fault!

The Tour blog still lacks a comments options or linkable posts, so it's still not really a blog. But at least they are updating it with content, including some interesting posts about the tension heading into Tuesday's player meeting in Charlotte.

Ferguson On Tour's Double Standard

Doug Ferguson examines the Mickelson pro am situation and reminds us of recent embarrassing moves by the PGA Tour:

In 2005, Chad Campbell wanted to play the 84 Lumber Classic – the tournament even had his wife sing at one of its functions – but he asked out of the pro-am Wednesday to attend his grandmother’s funeral. The Tour made him choose between the pro-am and the funeral, and Campbell withdrew from the tournament.

And...

Wes Short Jr. wanted to skip out on a pro-am because his father was about to have quadruple bypass surgery, but he had to choose between the pro-am and spending time with his father.

Love this from Jim Furyk...

His solution was to fine a player $100,000 for missing a pro-am – if he still wanted to play. Furyk suggested making anyone who missed the pro-am for whatever reason make it up by attending a two-hour corporate function.

“If it boiled down to me going out and playing for four or five hours ... or sitting in a room with a sports coat on for two hours, I think I’d take the outdoors,’’ Furyk said.