Tiger's New Nike Ad

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It's good to know that Tiger's scandal is a private matter...until Nike can conjure up a provocative-but-creepy 30-second spot out of it.

So does this mean in the next press conference it would be off limits to ask what Tiger was thinking when he enlisted Dr. Galea, and what he was thinking the night Earl died and he was with one of his women? Good grief.

Masters Par-3 Contest Open Thread

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I'm recording the annual Day Care Challenge from the Augusta National Par-3 Course so that I can relive the emotions over and over again, but for those of you subjecting yourself to the live torture telecast, here's your chance to comment.

That's 3:00 PM - 5:00 PM EST on ESPN in case you didn't already have it bookmarked, logged in your calendar and written in the palm of your hand.

Where's Ari Fleischer When You Need Him? Tiger Cell Phone Edition

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Let's forget the club rule about keeping the cell phones in the locker (except to record swings, says Steve Ethun), and just think big picture when looking at the images posted by TMZ (I'm still looking for a golf site that would post the images). Not really the best image for Tiger right now, eh?  According to Lawrence Donegan he was capturing the "hoop" in Mark O'Meara's stroke, however...I'm just saying...

ANGC Refresher Course

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If you're looking to refresh GolfDigest.com features interactive flyovers of Augusta National hole stats and anecdotes from Brett Avery, while Golf.com posts some killer aerials of key holes along with the new practice area.

As for changes, Rich Lerner touches on a few of them:

Poulter liked the few subtle changes made to the course. The front of the par 5 second was widened by “a few yards to make it more inviting to land the ball and possibly run it up, and front right at the 15th green has been flattened a bit so they can get a good hole location over there.”

The seventh tee has also been nudged up a bit and Poulter said simply, “that’ll help.”

“The course used to be a lot more fun to play 15 years ago,” said Furyk. “It’s become more of a grind.”

Grind? Oh Jim, according to Dean Knuth it's rating would only be a 78.1! 

"Suppose Bad Tiger was the key to it all?"

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Martin Samuel tackles a subject few have wanted to touch.

Genius needs to take the edge off. Genius needs to escape. Even after another lacerating public address, there remain many unanswered questions about Tiger Woods. The greatest even he cannot satisfy, because it cuts to the heart of his professional existence.

Suppose Bad Tiger was the key to it all? Suppose the waitresses and party girls were serving a purpose, fulfilling a need every bit as necessary as a good caddie or a swing coach? Suppose the hookers, the strippers, the porn actresses, the girls in the diners, the clubs, the casinos, suppose the whole coterie of casual sexual acquaintances were what helped make Woods the best golfer in the world?

"Sporting a new "rough-looking" goatee that made him look suspiciously like Evil Cartman."

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They sure know how to stage an event at Augusta (which makes this Monday incident all the more disturbing I've ever read, especially since it happened in some form with the club's blessing). And Tiger's press conference was no different. A few readers noticed some of the special touches, starting with Tiger's pink-striped shirt to appeal to the ladies, but most of the emailers I heard from were struck by Tiger's choreographed entrance.
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"Ma'am, are you the stripper?"

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We learned yesterday that Tiger comes to Augusta with an army of former FBI and Secret Service and the confirmation comes in this moment of bumbling stupidity that reads like an April Fools Joke and that the club committee should be investigating immediately if they have any concept how disturbing this is.

From Steve Elling, writing about the unusually hectic Monday on the course:

You can't tell these players without a scorecard, and in this case, players isn't a term being used to describe the 97 competitors.

As Woods played his practice round, a woman camped near the fifth tee was approached by a member of Woods' considerable security detail and was asked, "Ma'am, are you the stripper?"

The woman looked at the guy like he had a 3-iron growing out of his forehead. Thus, the security guard reached in his pocket and produced a sheet containing the color mugs shots of Woods' alleged mistresses, who are clearly on his watch list. It was a rogue's gallery, indeed.

"We've just got to be extra careful," the guard told the woman.

She wasn't quite sure how to react. But it was hard to view the inquisition as flattering.

"I'm not sure how to feel yet," she told a TV producer who watched the entire episode.

Welcome to the 2010 Masters, Year of the Tiger, where at least one security guard has a list of American's least-wanted.