I'll take the high road and resist the littany of potential belly jokes and just leave it to Bernie McGuire, reporting from Singapore, where Colin Montgomerie is hoping to feed off the presence of the world No. 1 the way he thinks people "fed off me when I was No.2 in the world."
"I'm using the belly putter but I don't agree with it, and I don't agree with you being allowed to hinge it against your body," said Montgomerie, who will be among five Scots in the field this week. "So while it's legal I will use it but as soon as it's not, I will agree with the powers to be in that it has to go. It's got to go.
"I can understand Keegan and Carl's reasoning in considering to take the matter further if the ban should come in, but no golf club should be anchored or hinged."
So he's going to hinge until they say he can't! That's our Monty...