Merion Day 6

So how far into Sunday's telecast will Dan Hicks go before mentioning that U.S. Amateur finalist Edoardo Molinari's parents have a home in Torino, Italy, where in just 165 days the 2006 Winter Olympics start...on NBC?! I say he doesn't make it past the first 20 minutes without a plug.

Here's the USGA.org game story and Alex Miceli on Dillon Dougherty's epic finish that included a big assist from the NBC broadcast tower on 18. 

Golfweek editor Dave Seanor writes a lengthy column about how the USGA should take the U.S. Open to Merion even if it takes a financial hit. But space remains the issue. He cites the many hurdles facing the course. Not having enough grandstand space or even walking room around the clubhouse may be the biggest problem for Merion.

After what we say today, it appears there's not even enough space to get the TV towers out of play.

Steve Williams Ball Incident**

I didn't pay much attention to the PGA episode with Steve Williams possibly stepping on Tiger's ball during Thursday's first round. But then Bob Verdi reported some Williams comments in the new Golf World that caught my eye. Wondering if it strikes you as red-flag worthy as well?

"Tiger's angry about this and so am I. He's under the microscope more than anybody. Me, I take great pride in my work. Kirsty [Williams' wife] is pregnant. She's going to have a boy. I'll be a father for the first time. You think I could live with it if I wasn't honest about this? Golf is a game of honor and respect. For anybody to question Tiger's and my integrity, that's not right."

Williams is referring to a report in the Newark Star Ledger where writer Kevin Manahan wrote:

In the scramble to find Woods' ball near a creek at the bottom of the fairway, Williams was the only person near the spot where he eventually found the ball, embedded in the ground. And, during the search, just before he found the ball, Williams was walking along the creek's bank when he made a step and quickly appeared to pull back his foot -- perhaps as if he had stepped on something. He then located the ball.

Notice in the comments to Verdi that Williams called on the dreaded wife+baby-on-the-way=honorable defense to shield him from questions about the episode. That's from page 1 of the modern day corporate crisis management model. Only Williams heaves Nikon's into lakes. He's not some gray suit-wearing CEO.

"And if I did step on it and Tiger had signed an incorrect scorecard, he'd have been disqualified. Does anybody think I would risk my reputation or Tiger's if there was even a doubt? Evidently, the paper here and The Golf Channel think so, because they had me guilty."

Thanks to reader Jeff for pointing out that Selena Roberts in the New York Times wrote about the episode in her Sunday, August 14 column (speed is not always the strength of this web site!):

As the uncivilized bouncer on the golf course, the churlish Steve Williams will hurl a fan's Nikon into a water hazard if its shutter clicks during the precious backswing of Tiger Woods.He would do anything to protect Woods, but would Williams give himself up? If Williams had been the culprit - and not a fan, cameraman or marshal, as he contended - Woods would have been penalized an additional stroke beyond the one he took for declaring the ball unplayable.

An added stroke, and the scorecard he signed would have been incorrect, meaning disqualification. An added stroke, and sponsors, TV executives and tournament officials would have headed home in a Buick carpool of tears. Williams didn't help prop up his version of the event by telling The Star-Ledger: "Even if I did step on it, it's not a penalty. Not in a hazard."

First problem, he was wrong about the rules. Any player whose caddie steps on his ball is guilty of a violation. But more important, the "even if" comment creates room for doubt as to whether it was Williams or horse-hoofed gremlins that stomped Woods's ball into the earth's core. Not even Woods believed the ball embedded itself, but he did not believe it was his caddie's fault.

Certainly, Williams should not be condemned without evidence, but the situation does illuminate how golf's integrity is founded on a guilty conscience. But what's worse, ratting out yourself as a golfer or penalizing your boss as his caddie?

Given Williams's impenetrable loyalty to Woods, it may not be too far-fetched to wonder if he was covering for himself to protect Tiger. That's what Williams does for a living. As if Tiger has never played on a municipal course next to a firehouse or alehouse, Williams demands absolute silence from galleries, photographers, blimps and, if given the chance, migrating geese overhead. He also acts as bodyguard, training partner and best friend. Williams is the intimidating caretaker of the PGA Tour's golden one. But did he make authorities blink?

Officials viewed the tape of the incident and found there was no evidence of any person stepping on the ball - they questioned everyone from marshals to spectators - but no one directly asked Williams if he was at fault. There was no inquisition because, as the P.G.A. Championship spokeswoman Rebecca Szmukler said: "It's an honor thing. It would be up to him to come forward." Honor is at the heart of golf - no matter how insignificant the whiff, lie or scorecard error seems.

**Reader George questioned the articles above (and my posting them a week after the fact...fair point). He suggested that  Tiger's remarks needed to be included in this tale since they do tell a different story. I agree:

Q. Did you think there was any possibility that Stevie might have stepped on the ball yesterday?

TIGER WOODS: Well, I saw the videotape just like all you guys saw, and if you look at it, he walks three steps closer to actually point out the golf ball, so he wasn't even near it. It's just one of those things where unfortunately the ball was embedded in there somehow. We don't know whether it was a marshal who did it five minutes ago, prior to that, or it was some photographer, it was some marshal, it was some we don't know, that's the thing. We don't know.

Q. But you're certain it wasn't him?

TIGER WOODS: No, he wasn't walking in the hazard. He was walking out of the hazard and the ball was in the hazard.

Final PGA Reads, Vol. 1

Here's Damon Hack's game story on Phil Mickelson's impressive PGA win, and another take from the UK's Lawrence Donegan in The Guardian.   And Jim Litke writes about Mickelson's amazing up-and-down on 18.

Mike Lopresti in the USA Today takes a much stronger stance on the CBS-PGA screw-up than his colleague, and uses the opportunity to look at all sports and the ways they are selling out their integrity in an effort to pander to the networks.

This is old, old news — television forcing a sport to genuflect to its demands, no matter how ludicrous. Buying off nonsense with a check. And yet maybe such a screwball ending will cause some needed reflection.

Television's billions feed the wolves and always will. Fact of life. But there ought to be a line … somewhere.

The folks at the Masters, self-proclaimed guardians of the purity of the game, do the same thing, pushing their Sunday start to the very last telegenic moment. And you know the other handwork of television. The 10 p.m. NCAA tournament games. The bloated NBA playoff format that stretches toward July. The NFL January playoff games in frigid northern cities at night. All for a few dollars more.

It Is High, It Is Far, It Is...in the Rough

Selena Roberts in the New York Times (reg. required) writes about flogging at Baltusrol and quotes yours truly on the subject.

Somehow golf has gotten to the point where inaccuracy isn't punitive because distance is so highly rewarded. A 330-yard drive into the rough, plus a wedge to the green, is far more attractive to a player than a 280-yard poke and a 5-iron to the pin.

But is might always right? There is an aberration on the leader board in Steve Elkington, who was in a tie with Thomas Bjorn for second place when the storms blew across Baltusrol last night. Elkington is the amiable Aussie with a caddie nicknamed Gypsy and a driving distance that ranks him 132nd on the PGA Tour. But his fairway accuracy is No. 14 at Baltusrol. He is not an equipment aficionado like Mickelson and Love or an all-consumed workout fiend like Woods and Singh.

"I couldn't be like Vijay," Elkington told Australian reporters last week. "I admire what he does, but I bet he doesn't even know where the light switches are at home."

In other words, Elkington has a life. But he occupied the space among the leaders as an anomaly. More and more, players like Woods, Mickelson, Singh and Love overpower their errors to find success. "I don't blame them," said Geoff Shackelford, author of "The Future of Golf: How Golf Lost Its Way and How to Get It Back," when reached by telephone yesterday. "Over the course of four rounds, it's a wise thing to do. Power is more important."

It has become an obsession. It's all about the equipment and computer analysis, the balls and the Launch Monitor, which, in essence, is a time-lapse X-ray of a swing to determine factors like ball spin and carry distance in order to match a player to the optimum club.

"Players have picked up 30 or 40 yards on their drives using it," Shackelford said.

What else are players using? Power cravings in any sport can lead to boundary pushing of the chemical kind. There is no whisper of a steroid problem inside the P.G.A., but there is also no drug testing. So how does anyone truly know surges in distance are all about technology and not about the designer steroid THG?

Of course we know golfers aren't on steroids, but still, Roberts brings up the point many of us are wondering. How long before such substances do become a part of the new look power game?

The Newfangled Bubba

It's a miracle that Steve Elling's Saturday lead made it by the Orlando Sentinel editor determined to "protect their readers":

Eat my dust, y'all.

The newfangled Bubba of the 87th PGA Championship, Phil Mickelson, again showed up Friday sporting the new lid he trotted out for the first time this week, a trucker-style cap with a mesh back. The way its mojo is working, if Mickelson can bum a dip of chaw from David Duval or a Marlboro from John Daly, find some flip-flops with spikes and cut the sleeves off his shirt, he might just collect his second major championship.

This being New Jersey, it won't be hard to find a rusted-out Trans Am with a Dale Jr. bumper sticker, either. How long does it take to grow a mullet or get a name embossed on a leather belt?

Best of Barkley**

Courtesy of TNT, the best of Charles Barkley. (Minus the "uh, oh, don't zoom in" comment after Woods hit his waterball on the 4th):

Barkley on close friend Tiger Woods and the extremely hot weather during the tournament: "It must be hot out there because Tiger is in great shape and he is sweating. When skinny people sweat, you know it's hot. I sent him a text (message) today to wish him good luck but I guess it didn't work"

Barkley on who is in better shape between he and Woods: "Well he has a six pack and I have a keg...and I would never want to have just six beers."

Barkley on the physical strain that golfing takes on his body: "I came to the realization a couple months ago that I am fat. If you get tired from walking - and that's all that golf is - then you are officially fat."

Barkley on his recent performance at the American Century Celebrity Championship , in which he finished directly behind Cheryl Ladd and Chris Webber: "It's embarrassing. If you are a man and you can't beat girls or the smart kids, you shouldn't be playing...I'm retiring from golf. I'm not going to play again."

**Update: Damon Hack's Saturday notes column in the New York Times looks at Barkley, and quotes him saying that if Phil Mickelson worked out like Tiger or Vijay, he'd be much better.