Least Subtle Self Reference By Johnny Miller In A Lead Analyst's Role

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Shockingly, it did not occur on the airwaves, but in this Q&A with Jerry Stewart he's discussing the possiblity of equipment regulation and just couldn't help himself:

A: I don't see a real issue here. Even with all the new equipment, a 63 is still a heck of a score. I managed to do it in an U.S. Open. 

If only I had every 63 at Oakmont reference... 

Another Sigmund Freud Award For The Most Nuanced Complaint About Tiger Without Using His Name

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2006yearinreview.gifPeter Kostis continue to rack up the hardware (his first award is here) and I know he feels blessed to have his subconscious fury highlighted on this web site.

Talking to Golf World's Stu Schneider, Kostis doesn't sound in any way threatened by Nick Faldo's arrival at CBS.

"Someone's going to have to define Nick's role," Kostis said. "Nick is a very funny guy, but he's not going to compete with [David] Feherty or McCord, and we don't need an excess of funny on our telecasts. I think he's being hired because of his golf knowledge and his ability to communicate it."

Don't worry Peter, there hasn't been an excess of funny for quite some time!

Best Comment By Bobby Clampett In His Role As The Announcer Who Mysteriously Remained Employed

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2006yearinreview.gifSo much wit and wisdom from Bobby Clampett in 2006, and most of it delivered right to my email box by the poor souls at TNT who would document his thoughts.

There was his ridiculous attempt to claim that there was "no bad blood" between Faldo and Woods at Hoylake, along with the ensuing jibberish about the TV business.

There was this, uh, brilliant metaphor to describe the par-4 12th hole at Poipu Bay:  “That hole is placed like a candle on the side of a birthday cake.”

And his big phrase of the week at Hoylake. How could you forget? Why it was that course's propensity for...come on, you remember:  “This golf course lends itself towards “bunching.”  You have to take your medicine on a certain number of holes and birdies are hard to come by.  And the combination of the two leads to bunching on the leaderboard.”

But my favorite was his tribute to Yogi Berra during the Grand Slam of Golf telecast, which, mercifully, I did not watch. Speaking of Geoff Ogilvy... 

"If he wasn't a professional, he'd be out there playing every day."

Best Reminder That R&A Secretary's Should Not Design Courses

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Peter Dawson, rambling on in such effortlessly obtuse fashion about his foray into design at Turnberry where he's trying to offset lax technology regulation:
"Sometimes you can't fully appreciate the impact of an alteration until it's been built and you have another look at them in reality rather than on a drawing," said Dawson yesterday.

"What we see the FedEx Cup doing is doing that on a weekly basis.”

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Damon Hack writing about the FedEx Cup, with this from Commissioner Finchem:

"When you see situations where a couple of top players are really pitted head to head, the Mickelson-Woods match from years ago in Doral, the year Ernie and Tiger went to a playoff in Hawaii,” he said, referring to Ernie Els, “those kinds of things can generate more interest. What we see the FedEx Cup doing is doing that on a weekly basis.”

That kicks in when, again? The Buick at Torrey Pines? Or the Buick at Warwick Hills? 

Best Sign That The Masses Do Not Enjoy Par Protection Golf

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It's fascinating to read year-end reviews touting this year's U.S. Open as 2006's best tournament. While it may have been the most dramatic and unforgettable, Tiger's artful display at Hoylake was a lot more inspirational and uplifting. (And that was before he broke down on 18).

The Nielson numbers said most people did not enjoy watching the train wreck golf brought on by Winged Foot's anti-birdie setup, but we know the USGA will surely blame Tiger's missed cut at Winged Foot for the lowest Saturday since measuring began and the second lowest rated final round since 1994.

Best Declaration of Augusta National's Architectural Demise By A Former Champion In A Leading Role

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2006yearinreview.gifSeem so long ago that we got to see Golf Digest's Ron Whitten flip flop on Tom Fazio's Augusta modifications after the floodgates were opened by Jack and Arnie much talked about criticism.

But for my money, Ben Crenshaw wins for his more subtle attack on the changes, printed in the USA Today by Jerry Potter.

Ben Crenshaw, a two-time Masters champion, says the Augusta National that Jones built after winning the Grand Slam in 1930 was "revolutionary in American golf course design at that time."

"It was completely different architecture," says Crenshaw, a golf historian when he isn't designing courses or playing senior golf. "The course Jones wanted had as many options to play a hole as was necessary to keep any golfer's fascination."

Jones wanted a course that was a pleasure for a recreational player and a challenge for a skilled player. It wasn't too long, it wasn't too narrow and it had no rough. It did have undulating greens that placed a premium on the second shot at each hole.

"There was a safe way and a dangerous way to play each hole," Crenshaw says. "It set itself apart from other courses."


Huggan On Uihlein: "He has to go."

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Remember Wally, I just copy and paste this stuff. In fact, reader David sent this to me, so I didn't find it, didn't write it, didn't think of it. That said, John Huggan has you on his Santa wish list...

2 A NEW LEADER AT TITLEIST: Sadly, the man in charge of the world's biggest golf equipment company is a world-renowned point-misser.

In a position to do the world of golf a favour and agree to withdraw his tacit threat to sue if the game's hard-pressed administrators should make rules that will shorten the vast distances the very best players can propel shots, Wally Uihlein chooses instead to follow a policy that can only damage the sport and, by extension, his own company, in the long term.

Look at some of the nonsense that we already have to put up with: courses covered in long grass and stretched to something like 7,500 yards so as to all but eliminate from contention anyone not physically big enough to hit drives over 300 yards on a consistent basis - goodbye Justin Leonard and Corey Pavin and Andrew Coltart.

All of which is largely down to Uihlein's intransigence.

He has to go.
Way harsh Huggy!

I also liked his plea for more Geoff Ogilvy's and fewer carts in the U.S., but this was especially good:

 

7 A DROUGHT IN AMERICA: Having not long returned from a visit to Australia, where water is currently in very short supply, Santa would like to see those conditions replicated in the US.

Having sampled fast-running fairways and greens that only enhanced the strategic qualities of the likes of Royal Melbourne, Kingston Heath and the stunning Barnbougle Dunes, some of the same would do nothing but good in the land of 'hit and stick'.

Instead of wedging on to pudding-like greens from basically anywhere, Uncle Sam's nieces and nephews would suddenly be forced to consider where best to place their drives. Angles would have to be created in order that approach shots could be landed short and run up to the flag.

Thinking on the golf course? What a concept, eh?

"The one thing we did not change was our signature No. 1 hole that features a green in the shape of Texas!"

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From the press release wire... 

Four Seasons Resort and Club Completes Cottonwood Valley Golf Course Design and Greens Enhancement

Irving, Texas -- Friday, December 22, 2006 -- Four Seasons Resort and Club officials announced today that the exclusive Cottonwood Valley Golf Course is slated to re-open in a grand celebration golf tournament for its private golf members on Saturday, December 30, 2006.

Exclusive? Did I miss a press release? 

Cottonwood Valley Golf Course was closed to Sports Club golfers in July for a multi-million dollar enhancement to its greens and for some exciting design enhancements to several holes. The work took place under the direction of golf course architect Jay Morrish. In addition, the golf course's logo has been updated so that it can be placed on everything from pin flags, to tee markers and golf apparel.

That's good to know.

"We are very excited to showcase the enhancements to our golf course," Cowan said. "It is truly a gem. Jay Morrish has done a tremendous job of taking a really memorable golf course and making it that much better. We are especially excited to be able to offer a more consistent quality to our greens and a more challenging experience for our members - many of whom have been playing the course since it opened in 1982. The one thing we did not change was our signature No. 1 hole that features a green in the shape of Texas!"

That's really good to know. I wonder if the fronting bunker in the shape of Oklahoma was restored to its original dimensions as well?

Course Highlights:  Some of the most noteworthy enhancements to the Cottonwood Valley Golf Course include 1) slight lengthening of the golf course overall from the championship tees 7,011 to 7,030,

Boy that ought to really offset the increased athleticism... 

2) replacement of the turf with fresh Bentgrass on all of the primary playing surfaces including tees and greens, 3) complete renovation of all the bunkers including new drainage, new barrier fabric to reduce erosion and contamination,

...for the inevitable Byron Nelson Classic deluges...